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Vance the Anti-Rance
Thursday, 17 June 2004
Okay Now Here is the Truth...I will not ever admit to anyone who I really am...
As an actress in Hollywood, people really always want to know if I get along with other people or not. While the questions alwasy get annoying from the press, the questions you all ask me tend to make me open up more. But some of you should do more research before you ask me anymore questions. Like I have worked with Sandra Bullock before in a movie called Practical Magic. And she was absolutely adorable to work with. She has so much charm and beauty about her it makes her irresistable in the sense that she is wonderful. I have met Ben before and he was a comlete gentleman. Very nice however rough around the edges. I use Ronnie Spector to maintain the deathly glow I have about me. Sad thing is though that I have never been able to fully tan or I get sunburnt. But Ronnie is a genius with makeup and always manages to make me look good.
When I was a little lass, I always wanted to become (and I know this may sound weird but I was 5) a trapeze artist. I thought that I was tall enough to make it to the next swing so I would be good at it. Now all I really want to accomplish in my life is to find someone to share my life with. My last guy didnt really work out and I would like to find my soulmate before I die.
My mother is indeed a royal desendent, but to be in complete honesty the mother I consider to be my mum in every way is not my biological mum so really I am not related to the desendent of QE2. Sorry! Rance is not anywhere near royalty so you were right there.
As for my professional life I would like to do a little theater before I die and it would be nice to do it in London. That would be a dream come true.
I hope that word does not get out on this blog. I like the idea of a small group to bond with. Sid, Chinq, and all the originals you guys are FAB! To the newcomers welcome to my world.
I have now stopped talks for starring in the new wonderwoman movie because I feel it would be the wrong move for my career at this point. Am looking forward to the bewitched sript. More on that next time. And in wonderwoman i would not have played the lead. I have chicken legs. I was up for a part as a professor. To all of you thanks for making this blog a success and let us please not spread this to other people. I want to keep it like it is.

Love,
Nic

Glad I could help Sid! Chinq you like royalty?

Posted by jazzyj49 at 5:28 PM PDT
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Wednesday, 16 June 2004
Vance the Anti-Rance
Well I just finished reading all of the posts that the readers of my blog have posted. Blogging is about mystery and about not exposing who you are as a person but exploring your life as a "normal" person with everyday problems. I think that the cynics who read this blog are going to automatically try and discredit who I really am or what I do. People like Rocker for example need to get a life. If I wanted to say my innermost desires I would certainly not expose them in a blog to people. I really do not care if you believe me anymore I know who I am and it is too bad if you do not believe me. This blog was about having an outlet to poor my emotions about Rance not trying to answer questions from Michael Jackson or the other person. I am who I say I am and if you dont belive me then fine but please do not call me a liar in my own blog that is uncalled for.
Now for the Rance question I believe that George has come close to winning a golden globe for the coen brothers movie he did awhile back and he has been nominated for an emmy for E.R. As for Warner Brothers being stiffed, it is one of the many perks of being considered a star you get to do whatever you want and make a lot of money. The second Oceans movie is supposed to make millions at the box office so I would guess that they would let him do whatever he wants as long as he makes the schedules in time.
For me I do not think that I am a descendent of Queen Elizabeth the Second, but I could ask my mother if you would like me to find out. As for the fact I am a Republican and I contributed to the campaign of Hillary Clinton, People can cross parties to support people for their campaigns. I did not like the slimy man who was running against her and I am all for women for presidents and senators so as a sister I had to contribute.
Thanks for all of your comments! If you guys would like to know anything else do not hesitate to ask. Thanks a lot. Sid hoped those plans helped!

Sincerely,
Nic

Posted by jazzyj49 at 11:11 AM PDT
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Tuesday, 15 June 2004
Dont get why you were all confused...
Readers now that you all know who I am. I can reveal the biggest hint of all that really confused some people...especially Rocker. Darlings I am actually an American and therefore can be a Republican when I vote fro the elections. I was born in the lovely state of Hawaii and moved to Australia when I was three years old. Hope this clears up some confusion on my part.

Love,
Nic

Posted by jazzyj49 at 11:12 AM PDT
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Monday, 14 June 2004
How is this for Honesty?
I am and have always been Nicole Kidman. If it will make you all happy I would be more than happy to acknowledge this anytime you would like me too. I have no shame in what I do nor will I ever and how dare you call me a liar I dont see your bum winning an oscar golden globe or SAG award. For your information I am a Republican buckoo so research before you open your yap. Oh yeah Rance is George Clooney and the house he is staying at in the Hamptons is Jerry Bruckheimer's pad. How is that for honesty B'OTCH!

Love,
nic

Posted by jazzyj49 at 7:58 PM PDT
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The Show Must go On...
Well I must start out by saying that all of you who doubt who I am have not done enough research to find out more about me...Some of you have discovered who I am and good for you but until you research my life even more you might want to find out a little more about my political background and use that to ease your suspicions of me not being who most of you have guessed I am. Also I can not nor never will fome out completely and acknowledge who I am because that would contradict the anonymity of my blog. My original quest was to expose Rance for who he was because while we are quite good friends he has made a laughing stock of my adopted country and I fear that he has taken the term politcal agitator to the next level and as the most loyal Republican actor since my beloved Ronald Reagan, I must say shame on Rance for tearing down the very nature of dirty politics.
Now on a more lighthearted news...I have not liked nor ever will like Julia Roberts. She and I crossed paths a few times during my time in Hollywood and I must say that she is the very essence of evil. The woman had the distinct pleasure of indicating that I had not taken the proper roles in the past ten years because I had a successful marriage and two kids. Mind you this was during a luncheon for Vanity Fair magazine about six or seven years ago. I took the high road and said merely that I had taken on some good roles, but I had just accquired a new child and would not like to take on meaty roles in fear of not being around for my son's early years. I also quipped back with the less eloquent comment that at least when my career had started itself I never degraded myself by playing a Prostitute. And ever since then I have never wished to see or ever seen her again. Sure we have worked with the same people but I would never want to speak wiht her again.
Careerwise I am currently looking at a script for Wonderwoman and it is looking very good to me. Although my competition for the role ranges from Mandy Moore to Kate Beckinsale(a true gem).
The most recent party I attended was the Tony Awards where I presented my longtime friend, Hugh, an award for the best musical actor for the role Of Peter Allen who is a legend in his own flamboyant right. I really am starting to be so happy about my career and friends. I have to go now so I hope all of you have a nice day and please post all of your comments. I enjoy reading them all.

Much Love,
Vance the Anti-Rance

Posted by jazzyj49 at 10:44 AM PDT
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Sunday, 13 June 2004
Well I am Still Not Telling...
I have to say that you are very good guessers! Rance is indeed George Clooney. I think the dead giveaway was the comment about the bet that I had made with him if he does not get married by the age of forty then i will pay him 10,000 dollars I also made the bet with Michelle Pfeifer. I will not say anymore about Rance since you all have guessed who he really is and I must say that I shall now ask you all something:

Would you like me to continue feeding you dirt on people of hollywood or should I stop?

That is my question for you all! Please write me and I shall go from there.

Much Love,

Vance the Anti-Rance

Posted by jazzyj49 at 1:08 PM PDT
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Friday, 11 June 2004
Hello to You All From Copenhagen....
I must say that all of you have very many interesting queries as to who I am exactly. Okay yes I am a Republican ACTRESS who has won an academy award in the last five years to be exact it was a lead actress nominee and win! I have known Rance for many years and have even made a bet with him. He is very much so a typical Bachelor and an ardent Democrat! He is also the biggest practical joker. Enough of him and I.

Rance is not:
Jim Carrey, Nicholas Cage, Tom Cruise, or Brad Pitt

I am not:
Julia Stiles, Helen Hunt, or Gwyneth Paltrow

Please let me know all of your guesses this is a lot of fun.
I have been reading for a new script for Wonderwoman and I must say that a potential remake would be very cool!

Thanks,
Vance the Anti-Rance

Posted by jazzyj49 at 9:57 PM PDT
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Thursday, 10 June 2004
What?
Rance is not Nicholas Cage! Think Funny but serious

Posted by jazzyj49 at 1:54 PM PDT
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Wednesday, 9 June 2004
Wow You like Me You Really Like Me...
Hello faithful readers,

My new fanbase has reached three. I feel loved. The guesses for who I am are intrigueing and the guesses for Rance are nada. This blog was designed to bring out Rance's true identity not my own. As for the gossip part I have to say something about hollywood otherwise my profile goes down I am afterall an Academy Award Winner. Just for the heck of it I must say that I am a woman but I find it funny that you are all naming women actresses! There are directors, screenwriters, and other people who are A-List and are not necessarily doing the acting thing. Also I am not any of the women you all listed. I am a Republican and conservative. Susan Sarandon was a great guess but she is an ardent liberal Democrat and I respect her for standing by her views like that! She is a true rolemodel however I am not her or she is not me. I have worked with Rance and one of his movies came out or will come out in 2004. He is a very funny guy too always playing practical jokes the Banana one was hilarious! I have to go read through a script for the new Wonderwoman movie. So I will talk to you all later. Sid daily visits for julia mean her period son!

Holla,
Vance the Anti-Rance

Posted by jazzyj49 at 11:05 AM PDT
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Monday, 7 June 2004
Oh You are very close...
Rocker I must say that you are very close but as to who I am. Afraid I can not say who I am until Rance is revealed and when he is I will say who I am. Until them I can only advise go with your gut instinct! I am a loyal fan of yours! I think you are the only one who has read this or heard of it. I am a female and I was in a couple English movies if that helps you at all. As for Rance he has a daughter no one knows about. Look it up!

Hot Celeb Gossip:

Lindsay Lohan and Wilmer Valdaramma(THAT 70S Show) are an item. can you say statutory rape?

Your daddy must have been a baker cuz you have a nice pair of buns!!!!!

Hint, Hint I like it dirty.

Later,
Vance the Anti-Rance

Posted by jazzyj49 at 6:16 PM PDT
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